105 International Women's Day Quotes: Funny & Inspiring

Words have incredible power, especially when celebrating the amazing women in our lives. International Women's Day gives us the perfect opportunity to share meaningful and fun quotes that honor the women who make our world brighter.

This collection brings together 105 carefully selected Women's Day quotes - from heartfelt tributes to lighthearted jokes that'll make her smile. Whether you're looking for the perfect words for your wife, mother, sister, or friend, you'll find just the right message here.

First established in 1909, International Women's Day has grown into a global celebration of women's achievements and a call for gender equality. Today, we continue this tradition by sharing words that inspire, encourage, and celebrate the wonderful women in our lives.

1. "To generalize on women is dangerous. To specialize on them is infinitely worse." - Rudolph Valentino

A witty observation about the complexity of understanding women, perfect for making her laugh

2. "There are two ways to rule a woman and nobody knows them." - Kin Hubbard

A humorous take on the futility of trying to "figure out" women

3. "Being a woman is a terribly difficult task since it consists principally in dealing with men." - Joseph Conrad

A clever commentary on relationship dynamics that's sure to earn a knowing smile

4. "Women sleep on the right side of the bed because even while sleeping they have to be right!"

A playful jab at the eternal "who's right?" debate in relationships

5. "If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning." - Aristotle Onassis

A sweet sentiment wrapped in humor about women's value

6. "If the world were ruled by women then there would be no war... Just a couple of nations not talking with each other."

A funny spin on women's communication styles and conflict resolution

7. "One of the most difficult things in the world is to convince a woman that even a bargain costs money." - Edgar Watson Howe

A lighthearted quip about shopping habits that many couples can relate to. Looking for more ways to make your wife smile? Check out our collection of Inspirational Quotes for Wife that she'll love all year round.

8. "When women go wrong, men go right after them." - Mae West

Mae West's famous wordplay showcasing women's irresistible charm

9. "Sometimes it takes balls to be a woman."

A bold statement about female strength with a humorous twist

10. "When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country." - Elayne Boosler

A funny comparison of how different genders handle stress

11. "The problem with life is, by the time you can read women like a book, your library card has expired." - Milton Berle

A clever metaphor about the timing of relationship wisdom

12. "All women are basically in competition with each other for a handful of eligible men." - Mignon McLaughlin

A tongue-in-cheek observation about dating dynamics

13. "I'd much rather be a woman than a man. Women can cry, they can wear cute clothes, and they are the first to be rescued off of sinking ships." - Gilda Radner

A humorous list of female "advantages" that'll make her laugh

14. "Women are like police, they can have all the evidence in the world but they still want a confession."

A playful comparison that rings true in many relationships. Want to share some motivation with your partner too? Our Motivational Quotes for Your Husband offers perfect words of encouragement.

15. "Here's to my wife, who can find humor in toddler tantrums and husbandly mishaps alike." 

A sweet acknowledgment of a wife's ability to handle life's chaos with grace

16. "To my wife, who can talk on the phone, cook dinner, and referee a sibling rivalry, all at once." 

Celebrating the amazing multitasking abilities of wives everywhere

17. "I've got a gift that's beyond my imagination. It's a courageous woman who's my friend and love, my wife." 

A heartfelt compliment wrapped in playful admiration

18. "Sometimes it's the princess who kills the dragon and saves the prince." – Samuel Lowe 

A modern twist on fairy tales that celebrates female strength

19. "You're proof that brilliance and chaos can coexist perfectly." 

A charming way to acknowledge both smarts and spontaneity

20. "Women are like coffee: strong, hot, and indispensable every morning." 

A relatable comparison that coffee-loving wives will appreciate. If you enjoyed our funny quotes section, you'll love our complete collection of  Funny Love Quotes  that celebrate relationships with humor.

21. "Happy Women's Day! You're the only one who can make 'five more minutes' last an hour." 

A playful nod to different concepts of time

22. "To the woman who runs the world and trips over nothing, stay adorable!" 

Celebrating both strength and endearing quirks

23. "Cheers to you! May your Women's Day be as smooth as your last-minute outfit changes." 

A funny tribute to quick-thinking and adaptability

24. "Happy Women's Day! May your mascara stay perfect even when life doesn't." 

Beauty humor that acknowledges life's imperfect moments

25. "Happy Women's Day! You're the glitter glue holding my messy life together." 

A sparkling metaphor for a wife's essential role

26. "To my fave gal: You're tougher than a Monday and sweeter than a Friday. Happy Women's Day!" 

A week-themed compliment that any working woman will understand

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1. "As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied." - Oscar Wilde 

A playful observation about mom's timeless beauty and youth

2. "Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid." - George Carlin 

A humorous take on gender dynamics that moms will appreciate

3. "We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops." - Henny Youngman 

A lighthearted quip about mom's shopping enthusiasm

4. "Mum, you're not just a chef; you're the master of turning 'whatever's in the fridge' into a Michelin-starred meal." 

Celebrating mom's magical kitchen abilities

5. "Mum, you're our superhero, your cape is invisible, but your powers of love, patience, and snack preparation are unmatched!" 

A sweet tribute to mom's everyday superpowers

6. "To the woman who turns every 'oops' moment into a 'ta-da!' – Mum, your quick thinking and resourcefulness could rival any magician's!" 

Appreciating mom's ability to handle unexpected situations

7. "Cheers to the lady who multitasks with ease, Happy Women's Day – you aim to please!" 

A celebration of mom's juggling abilities

8. "The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world." - William Ross Wallace 

A classic quote acknowledging mom's influence

9. "Mother, in the kitchen you reign, but today, let's pretend you're on a plane, first-class, no strain!"

A playful wish for mom's relaxation

10. "You taught me to tie my shoes, and how to choose my battles, and that's why I owe you, a castle with no rattles." 

A cute reminder of mom's life lessons

11. "Thanks for the genes, Mom. Now, can we talk about the return policy?" 

A humorous take on inherited traits

12. "Happy Women's Day to the woman who taught me how to be dramatic and then calls me a drama queen." 

A playful acknowledgment of learned behaviors

13. "Here's to the woman who tells me 'nothing's wrong' and I know to prepare for everything." 

Understanding mom's subtle communication style

14. "Happy Women's Day to the woman who has the superpower to hear a whisper from three rooms away." 

Celebrating mom's extraordinary hearing abilities

15. "Mom, the magician who can turn a hug into a cure for anything." 

Recognizing the healing power of mom's love

16. "Happy Women's Day to the one who thinks 'LOL' means 'Lots of Love'. Keep texting, Mom." 

A sweet tease about mom's texting style

17. "The age of a woman doesn't mean a thing. The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles." - Ralph Waldo Emerson 

A beautiful sentiment about ageless grace

18. "You are fierce, bold, and daring. Also, the best when it comes to caring — Happy International Women's Day!" 

Celebrating mom's strength and nurturing nature

19. "Wishing you a Women's Day where the laundry folds itself and the wine pours itself." 

A wishful dream for mom's perfect day

20. "To the woman who can charm a room and scare a spider, stay awesome!" 

Appreciating mom's versatile abilities

21. "Here's to you on Women's Day! May your phone battery last as long as your gossip sessions." 

A playful wish for uninterrupted mom time

1. "Give a girl the right shoes and she can conquer the world." - Marilyn Monroe 

A metaphor for female empowerment that combines confidence with style

2. "Men enjoy being thought of as hunters, but are generally too lazy to hunt. Women, on the other hand, love to hunt, but would rather nobody know it." - Mignon McLaughlin 

A clever observation about female capability and modesty

3. "I can't think of any better representation of beauty than someone who is unafraid to be herself." - Emma Stone

A powerful message about authenticity and self-acceptance

4. "A woman is beautiful in every way. But when she becomes a mother, her glory shines and her power flourishes." 

Celebrating the transformative power of motherhood

5. "A mother's love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible." - Marion C. Garretty 

Recognizing the extraordinary strength that comes from maternal love

6. "There is no limit to what we, as women, can accomplish." - Michelle Obama 

An inspiring reminder of women's boundless potential

7. "At some point in a woman's life, she just gets tired of being ashamed all the time. After that, she is free to become whoever she truly is." - Elizabeth Gilbert 

A powerful message about self-acceptance and personal growth

8. "In the future, there will be no female leaders. There will just be leaders." - Sheryl Sandberg 

A vision of true equality in leadership

9. "My mother told me to be a lady. And for her, that meant be your own person, be independent." - Ruth Bader Ginsburg 

Redefining femininity through independence and strength

10. "What I want young women and girls to know is: You are powerful and your voice matters." - Kamala Harris 

An empowering message about speaking up and being heard

11. "I do not wish women to have power over men, but over themselves." - Mary Shelley 

A timeless message about personal empowerment

12. "Where there is a woman, there is magic." - Ntozake Shange 

Celebrating the unique power and influence of women

13. "Extremists have shown what frightens them most. A girl with a book." - Malala Yousafzai 

A powerful statement about education and female empowerment

14. "Think like a queen. A queen is not afraid to fail. Failure is another stepping-stone to greatness." - Oprah Winfrey 

Encouraging resilience and fearless pursuit of goals

15. "Women, they have minds, and they have souls, as well as just hearts. And they've got ambition, and they've got talent, as well as just beauty." - Saoirse 

Ronan Acknowledging the full spectrum of female capabilities

16. "You educate a man; You educate a man. You educate a woman; You educate a generation." - Brigham Young 

Highlighting the far-reaching impact of female education

17. "Define success on your own terms, achieve it by your own rules, and build a life you're proud to live." - Anne Sweeney

Encouraging women to chart their own path

18. "I am grateful to be a woman. I must have done something great in another life." - Maya Angelou 

A joyful celebration of womanhood

19. "I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day, and I believe in miracles." - Audrey Hepburn 

A message of optimism and resilience

20. "She is a dreamer, she is a believer, she is a doer, she is an achiever, and she is 'You'." 

An empowering reminder of every woman's potential

These inspirational quotes remind us of the incredible impact women have on our world. They celebrate achievement, encourage growth, and inspire the next generation of female leaders.

1. "It's the 21st century. I don't need an alpha male to protect me. I don't need a big, strong man to fight off a tiger. I need a geek who can get my naked photos off the cloud" - Whitney Cummings 

A modern love declaration with a humorous twist

2. "I love you so much that I'd jump off a cliff for you. Well, as long as they're not too high, I'm acrophobic. Alright, maybe just a few stairs." 

A sweet and funny expression of devotion

3. "You are the poem I never knew how to write, and this life is the story I've always wanted to tell." - Tyler Knott Gregson 

A beautiful metaphor for love's creative inspiration

4. "A woman is the full circle. Within her is the power to create, nurture, and transform." - Diane Mariechild 

Celebrating the completeness and power of womanhood

5. "You are the sun that breaks through every storm, a love I'll forever adore." - Lang Leav 

A romantic comparison to nature's most powerful forces

6. "She is a wildflower, fierce and free, blooming where she's planted." - Nikki Rowe 

Appreciating natural beauty and independent spirit

7. "A woman's heart is an ocean of secrets, and I'd sail it forever to know you." - Nicholas Sparks 

A romantic metaphor about love's endless depth

8. "Women hold up half the sky, and in their hands, they cradle love." - Mao Zedong 

Acknowledging women's strength and tenderness

9. "You are my heart's epic adventure, a woman worth every word." - Neil Gaiman 

Expressing love as an exciting journey

10. "She walks in beauty, like the night of cloudless climes and starry skies." - Lord Byron 

A classic poetic tribute to feminine grace

11. "Women are the roots of every tree, grounding us in love." - Alice Walker 

Highlighting women's foundational role in life and love

12. "Women are the threads that weave the fabric of life." - Gloria Steinem

Celebrating women's connecting and nurturing nature

13. "She rises, she shines, she loves without limit." - Beyoncé 

A celebration of boundless female love

14. "You are the bloom in every season, a love everlasting." - William Shakespeare 

Comparing love to nature's eternal cycle

15. "Her love is the melody that never ends." - T.S. Eliot 

Describing love's endless musical quality

16. "Women are the roots of love, growing deep and strong." - Mary Oliver 

A natural metaphor for women's nurturing love

17. "You are the dawn I wake to, the love I live for." - Ernest Hemingway 

A poetic expression of daily devotion

18. "Her courage was her crown, and she wore it like a queen." - Atticus 

Admiring strength and grace in love

1. "There is no force equal to a woman determined to rise." - William Wallace 

A powerful statement about female determination

2. "The strongest person is a mother who protects her child, prays for his long life, and prepares him for the world." 

Celebrating maternal strength and dedication

3. "The strength of a mother is the foundation on which a family thrives." - J.K. Rowling 

Acknowledging the essential power of motherhood

4. "A strong mom can conquer any mountain, with her children by her side." - Michelle Obama 

Highlighting the combination of maternal strength and family bonds

5. "There is nothing stronger than a broken woman who has rebuilt herself." - Hannah Gadsby 

Recognizing the power of resilience and recovery

6. "There's something about a woman with a loud mind that sits in silence, smiling, knowing she can crush you with the truth." - R.G. Moon 

Appreciating quiet confidence and inner strength

7. "Strong women don't have 'attitudes', we have standards." - Marilyn Monroe 

Redefining strong character as principled living

8. "A feminist is any woman who tells the truth about her life." - Virginia Woolf 

Celebrating authenticity as strength

9. "Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim." - Nora Ephron 

Encouraging active self-empowerment

10. "If you don't see a clear path for what you want, sometimes you have to make it yourself." - Mindy Kaling

Inspiring proactive leadership

11. "Fight and push harder for what you believe in, you'd be surprised, you are much stronger than you think." - Lady Gaga 

Motivating persistence and self-belief

12. "Empowered women who reach tough or unconventional positions to make choices and not sacrifices." - Kiran Bedi 

Celebrating achievement without compromise

13. "There's something so special about a woman who dominates in a man's world. It takes a certain grace, strength, intelligence, fearlessness, and the nerve to never take no for an answer." - Rihanna 

Honoring trailblazing women

14. "Beauty is about being comfortable in your own skin. It's about knowing and accepting who you are." - Ellen DeGeneres 

Defining true beauty through self-acceptance

15. "A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't." - Rhonda Hansome 

A witty take on female capability

16. "Life is tough, my darling, but so are you." - Stephanie Bennett-Henry 

A simple reminder of inner strength

17. "Women are the largest untapped reservoir of talent in the world." - Hillary Clinton 

Highlighting women's potential

18. "Friends. Sisters. Mothers. Professors. When women affirm women, it unlocks our power." - Elaine Welteroth

Celebrating female solidarity

19. "There is a stubbornness about me that never can bear to be frightened at the will of others. My courage always rises at every attempt to intimidate me." - Jane Austen 

Praising resilience against opposition

20. "You don't have to play masculine to be a strong woman." - Mary Elizabeth Winstead 

Embracing feminine strength

These 105 Women's Day quotes offer something for every relationship and occasion - from funny messages that'll make her smile to powerful words that inspire. Share them to show the amazing women in your life just how much they mean to you. After all, sometimes the perfect quote can say what our hearts feel but our words can't express it.